This is a necessary sacrifice post. Yuck...............
I used to be so angry and stuff about the whole Praba cheating on me with his vocalist Sarah. And well, like everyone, I called both of them names bla bla bla. I even called Sarah - PIG. Haha. Of course he doesn't think she's a pig. She certainly doesn't look like one. She's pretty. Really pretty. And I always say to this to Praba, I'm sure she's great and everything but you lost someone as awesome as me. Okay yes, we always say be humble. But that's just a way to bring yourself up, you know? You say these words when you're about to cry especially after you had such a brilliant relationship and suddenly Praba blurts out he has a secret thing for that pig, oops I mean Sarah.
Oh yeah, sure Praba was a loser towards to the end, real huge jerk/bastard haha whatever names you wanna call the person that cheated on you. But I have to add that well we didn't break up cos, we couldn't click/commit/agree/get along, hate each other or whatever stories you guys cook up.
The reason I'm even wasting time and post and energy on this is because people seem to think that I somehow mistreated him or worst, I was the one who cheated on him, cos they see me with another guy outside. Reminder: Praba. Eh no, Rudy is with Sarah out there probably holding hands. She doesn't even call him his real name. And most of you too. So just bloody mind your own business and stay out of this.
My friend Ryan almost got into a fight yesterday because people out there thinks he's going on a scandal with me. Like we're the meanies that are cheating on Praba. It's that serious, yeah so I'm wasting all those things I mention up there for this. People? you can talk all you want really, I don't give a damn, just don't involve the people I'm hanging out with. Oh, don't involve the innocents. And hey, no violence please.I have to admit, when I felt like crap back then, I criticised, cursed and called them all sorts of name just to make myself feel better. Haha, there was this once, I said to Praba, you settled for something lesser, Praba repeatedly disagreed in such a tone, I didn't settle for anything lesser! A lot of times siaaa. Why suddenly so........ defensive boy? (:
Well to many maybe he didn't settle for something lesser - different people, different perspective. It's okay. I wasn't trying to boast. Just said that to make myself feel better. It wasn't easy but I've manage. That blurting out part? That made me feel completely crushed. It was as if Praba's giant foot had stomped on me, flattening me like a pancake. But hey, today, I am a happy lady and I congratulate myself on my break up. No one ever says that, do they? Like... Heyyyyy, Congratulations on your break up!!!!
Somewhere along all these, I fell in love again - with my new life. I realised that while I still hoped one day to find real and lasting love, the life I am leading in the meantime is fantastic! In some ways, that was what I'd been looking for all along - happiness that came from within. I didn't need a man to fulfill me. I found new and meaningful ways to lead a fulfilling life on my own terms.
There is life after all the pain. It does get better. You just have to have a little faith. After all, it's just a break UP not a break DOWN. Hah!
